Monday, July 30, 2012

Death by Slurpee or Mary Poppins


The best I could muster last week, a week during which I felt too sleep-deprived to push out a good speed workout, was 3x1 mile on Thursday morning.  Even though this felt pretty miserable, and I would have prefer to work harder for 4x1 mile or 5x1 mile, I was happy that my legs were behaving my demands to pick up the speed even when I really, really didn't feel like it.

5:57; 5:49; 5:51 (one lap jog in between).

A week of no (or almost no) speed work meant a week full of slower miles.  This in turn meant I falsely believed that I didn't need to take a day off of running, since all the runs were on the easier side.  I ran 12-13 miles/day on Tuesday through Friday, then 18 miles on Saturday, and found myself with a very tired and sore calf muscle on Sunday.

Monday and Friday are the days I typically do not run.  I didn't take Friday off, and now I shall pay.  I think the calf needs a day or two off and a little massaging, and will be fine.

And if you're keeping tabs, I caught up on sleep over the weekend.  Big time. 

Disappointingly, nobody takes pictures of me while I sleep adorably, so this image will do.

11 hours of sleep into Saturday, 10 hours of sleep into Sunday.  I can't think of anything more delicious than sleeping in.  Oh how I love sleeping in!!  I always thought adults outgrew this.  I can't recall ever seeing my parents wake up after 7:00 a.m.  While I haven't slept in past 10:30 a.m. in at least a decade, which I like to think is some proof that I have exited teenager-hood, I very very rarely wake up before 8:00 a.m. naturally.  Of course, 21 hours of sleep in 2 days put my sleep-meter at capacity, so the insomnia was back Sunday night.

Another thing I love besides sleeping in? Slurpee's.

My Ode to the Slurpee:

I have been dreaming of Slurpee's all Summer.  I went to bed Saturday night, excited to wake up the next day so I could get a Slurpee.

I love walking into a 7-11 and finding the flavor choices.  No two 7-11's are alike! The best flavor I ever had was in March of 2008 in Laguna Beach.  I think it was tangerine-mango.  I will never forget it.

To satisfy my craving, on Sunday we walked to one of the two 7-11's that are within 1 mile of our apartment (the rumors about California are true, there are 7-11's on every block) and I decided to forego my usual choice of the smaller Slurpee cup.  I went big.  I got the XXXXXLarge, whatever it was.  Practically the size of a gallon of milk.

I got the size on the right.  Plus 5 inches squeezed into the round lid area.

I happily chugged my Slurpee, so content to be quenching my thirst.  Then with about 1/8th left in the ginormous cup, I realized I wasn't so thirsty anymore, and was actually feeling pretty ill.  I proceeded to get a headache and stomachache, and tried to find a corner in Trader Joe's where I could take a nap.  Walking home from TJ's with groceries and a stomach full of 87 ounces of Slurpee was just about the hardest workout I have ever had.

While sprawled in a chair before committing to the walk home, the Gentleman tried to teach me a lesson through allegory in which he explained that I would be the worst kind of drug addict, because when I like something I tend to think the best solution is to imbibe the greatest amount possible of it.  It was then that I vowed to never get a Slurpee bigger than a size normal-human-stomach ever again.  And not to try cocaine.

Olympic Observations:

In no particular order:

1) Many of the women swimmers sound to me like they are deaf during their post-race interview.  Not to pick on deaf-person voices.  They're kind of endearing, in an Andre the Giant sort of way.

2) The women gymnasts give each other bitch-hugs right after they finish a performance.  Bend forward at the hips, barely touch shoulders, stiff pat on the back, and then walk away thinking, "I hope she gets fat."

3) Post-performance interviews are. the. worst.  Drinking game: one drink every time an athlete says "at the end of the day," or "gave it my best," or "did what I had to do."  I'm going to give a gold medal to the athlete who has the most genuine and unscripted interview, which will probably be Michael Phelps.  Have you noticed?  He gives the best interview answers, because they seem like something that ran out of his brain, rather than something pre-approved by a Public Relations person.  Go Phelps!

4) Speaking of Phelps.  His media-manufactured rival, Ryan Lochte, seems like the a world class douche.  Just a couple tiers below Kalon from the Bachelorette, Donald Trump, Charlie Sheen, etc.  While he's not quite on that level, have you seen his Mariah Carey-esque closet of shoes?  Or his hella smug grin?  Cocky diva.  Something about him gives me the shudders.

You love swimming, wearing a grill, and shopping for expensive bright shoes? We have nothing in common.

Nope.  Also not working for me.  Source.

5a) The Olympic opening ceremony.  No joke, the Gentleman and I spent two hours looking at the television, looking back at each other, and asking "WHAT is happening!? WHY are we watching this!? Ohhhhh the horror.  The horror."  Really, the ultimate point of horror was when I realized it had been 45 minutes of watching nurses dancing and children bouncing on hospital beds, and that I could no longer remember a time in my life that was free of dancing nurses.  Mary Poppins, save us from the dancing nurses!!

Save us Mary Poppins! Save us Tom Cruise!

5b) The best part of the opening ceremony, for me personally, was when Mr. Bean dreamt he was in Chariots of Fire and he tripped the lead running stud.  I exclaimed, "too soon, Mr. Bean, too soon....Mary Decker Slaney", and that is my favorite inside-blog-reference-joke of the week.

Is anyone not watching the Olympics? It must be awkward at the water cooler for you.  I'm personally burnt out already.  


  1. Agreed about Mr. Bean, but I haven't watched a lot because of the San Francisco Marathon (which was so cold and foggy.)

  2. About the Olympic I agree with you on all of it.

    Ryan L. and his stupid thank you...same for his green shoes...yikes
    the is the less genuine hugs in the world....but the parents are the ones who are giving the best show!!! hilarious to see their faces!!

    I wish the media would just leave Michael P. the hell ALONE..way too much pressure on the guy. He has already given enough. the blonde woman who does the interviews at the pool is the worst

    the opening..,I agree Mr Bean was the best!

  3. Agree on all the Olympic thoughts. Lochte is a Gator, though, I'm not sure he has a choice. I think he's just destined to be a dick.

  4. The opening ceremony was entertaining but waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay tooooooooooooooooo looooooooooooooooooooooooooong. The Mr. Bean part was the best.

    This is the first year that I've ever really paid any real attention to the Olympics, but is it just NBC or are the commentators usually so negative? I have no clue who came in second and third in the men's 200m whatever, but I know that Phelps came in 4th! Michael Phelps came in 4th! Can you believe that Phelps came in 4th? Not "good for Lochte and the 2nd and 3rd place finishers" but "MICHAEL PHELPS CAME IN 4TH!?!!?!???!"

    The end of days is upon us, but mostly upon Michael Phelps. No wonder the guy looks like he never wants to see a pool again. The commentators also need to thank Lochte for winning the silver in the men's 400m relay because the rest of the team deserved the gold; Lochte had an entire body length lead when he jumped into the water.

    BTW, did you hear Michael Phelps came in 4th?

  5. Dang I can't get over how fast you are and the miles you put's awesome. That's a big ass slurpee top, lol. Sleeping for a long time sounds so good right now...maybe I'll sleep in on Saturday. We didn't watch the opening ceremony...not really into that part of it.mthe gymnasts hugs r fake..and awkward. Lochte doesn't seem to be too happy with his latest 2 performances...and why do u need that many shoes!? I/we do enjoy watching the games though but the interviews and the commentators r a bit annoying.

  6. I'm not watching the Olympics. I'm trying to ignore it as it clogs up my twitter feed. And I'm sorry to say it, since I'm sure it will offend many people, but Mr. Bean is not funny. Not even a little bit.

  7. Are you sure you're not pregnant? Just kidding, of course. Your Slurpee obsession is right on par with my Slush Puppy obsession, but I can't find them anymore. Otherwise I'd probably be at the gas station every night after dinner.

    I'm supposed to love Ryan Lochte because he's a Gator and honestly he really doesn't bother me. What does bother me is the 5,000 people on my facebook newsfeed who have linked to some post that says "UF has more medals than Great Britain."

    I fell asleep multiple times during the opening ceremony.

  8. Ha! Bitch hugs!

    Also, yeah, that opening thing was a train wreck. I kept flipping to it and laughing hysterically, but my husband was just not amused at all and didn't want anything to do with it. Ever. The other day he even talked about how uncomfortable he felt while watching. Does that make it art???

  9. No one at my work is watching the Olympics. I'm the awkward one at the water cooler "So did you see Missy Franklin's swim last night?" *blank stare* "Who?"

  10. Aw, i like Lochte's lil grin -- so cute! Loving watching the Olympics...don't think I had cable 4 years ago or something. I just feel pretty lazy each evening vegging out while the Olympians work so hard.

  11. I agree about Phelps. And this still blows me away -- what would it be like to have a goal that big (the 8 golds in 2008) -- work toward it for years, achieve it, and then have to ask yourself... what now? He takes on the continued media hype/expectations in a way that's professional and humble. Class act.

    PS. Andre the Giant / Bitch hugs comments? ROFL. I'm going to go back and reread those paragraphs and lol again.

  12. The best part about the Olympics is making up dialogue for the athletes. Does anyone else do this? Tim and I have a field day with the gymnasts, because they are so cute yet such Mean Girls, I can just feel it.

  13. I totally agree about hideous post-performance athlete interviews. I have a strict "we don't listen to athletes" rule in my house. The second a mic gets stuck in front of an athlete's face the mute button gets pushed.

    As a former gymnast, I was going to try to defend them by saying "oh, they're probably just trying to not get chalk on each other." But no, they probably really are trying to fat curse the other girl.

  14. The post-event interviews remind me of this:

    Crash Davis: It's time to work on your interviews.
    Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: My interviews? What do I gotta do?
    Crash Davis: You're gonna have to learn your clichés. You're gonna have to study them, you're gonna have to know them. They're your friends. Write this down: "We gotta play it one day at a time."
    Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: Got to play... it's pretty boring.
    Crash Davis: 'Course it's boring, that's the point. Write it down.

  15. I noticed the same thing about the lady swimmers. Maybe they are wearing ear plugs in the water and forget to take them out for the interview? I am not a fan of anyone with a grill.

  16. You are hilarious - you summarize everything I notice about the Olympics but don't realize that I notice!

    Like Caitlin, are the swimmers wearing earplugs maybe? Or maybe their ears are somewhat waterlogged?

    The womens gymnastics competition where they are on a team but still competing against each other to make the all around is a bizarre concept. It's like they want each other to do well, but at the same time fail. Crazy. When the 3rd US girl didn't make the all around final, they had a camera shot where they were interviewing the girl who made it, with the crying girl in the background. NBC must have been loving the drama!

    Gymnastics may be a bizarre sport - but wow it has great drama - take yesterday for the mens team when Japan got a silver after protesting the judges ruling? Great TV again, lol.

    The questions from the interviewer at poolside are bizarre. It's like they are trying to stir up controversy. Let the athlete say what they want to say, and be done with it. I mainly want to hear how much it means it them and how the race went in their eyes.

    Opening ceremony was okay for me, kind of bizarre, but they are always bizarre. Bond, the Queen, David Beckham and the Queen were all pretty cool. I was reading that NBC cut out a tribute to the 7/7/05 London bombing victims from the coverage? That is not cool.

    I love the Olympics, and really until they are over I have no idea what else is going on in the world!

  17. I have watched not one single moment of the Olympics. Fortunately, I have no water cooler to be awkward around.

    I have looked at some of the athlete profiles for my favorite sport and discovered that there is a woman competing in the single scull who is 40. She won gold in 96 and 2000, silver in 04 and bronze in 08. Fucking machine :) To stay at the top of the game for so long is just beyond impressive. I'd love to see her race.

    Does that dude REALLY have that many shoes? That seems like something dude would want to keep under wraps, y'know?

    I really hope your leg is feeling better soon :)

  18. Can we please watch the Olympics together? 95% of these thoughts I've had myself. As an old retired swimmer, they grab them right after they finish before they even get a cooldown. It takes at least 10 minutes to breath and talk like a normal person. It would essentially be like talking to a runner as they are step off out of the finish corral. And I hate Ryan Lochte. "I won this race for Lotche nation" is the biggest asshole statement I've ever heard.

  19. Sleep and slurpees!! Also two of my absolute favorite things. No joke. I have a supremely awesome memory of your Dad driving us all to 7-11 in the jeep and we got slurpees and beef jerky and I remember it being a totally rad day.

  20. Your mean girls explanation is a funnier version of the exact same thing I was thinking! Next time I see you after a race, I'll be sure to do the same ;)

  21. Hi! I direct bitsy running races, and therefore am blessed with waaay too many running shirts. One of my runners is an avid reader & alerted me to your laundromat disaster. Would you like some free tech Ts? No need to blog about them :). If so, email me at


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